Are you a surface cleaner like me? Have you ever noticed how much gunk is below the surface when you get down to it? The other day my partner and I finally got down to it and really cleaned the house. Like sit on the kitchen floor scrubbing with a toothbrush down to it. Believe you me, this doesn’t happen often. I am a surface cleaner. I keep things tidy. But man, the layers of gunk below the surface. Yikes!!
So as my mind does when I’m doing something that I really don't love, it wandered. I began to see the tidy on the surface/gunk down below as an analogy for how we often show up tidy on the surface while there is a bunch of gunk down below. Stick with me here as I am completely aware my brain might have just been really bored and this analogy might be a stretch! But the more I do my own work, the less able I am to pretend anymore. And I wonder if this is true for you? When you catch yourself smiling and saying “I’m fine” when down below there is a volcano about to erupt, what does that feel like in your body? Your mind? Or the opposite can be true. Someone asks you how you are and you answer honestly and they just stare at you like you have 2 heads. What does that feel like for you?
I’m curious about this idea more and more. How to be vulnerable and authentic in a world that supports us more often in being fake? How do we show up, with all our gunk, and survive in a world that gets really uncomfortable with women being authentic and brave?
As you can probably guess, I’m going to mention Brené Brown now. I’m not a very subtle person. Her work around vulnerability has been transformational for me and my life. Learning how to embrace vulnerability and know that it is the thing that creates the beautiful connections with people that I have in my life is something I wouldn’t trade for anything. And, it takes practice. Over and over and over again. It’s not a one-time lesson. It’s the deep, below the surface cleaning.
If you’re interested in cleaning out your gunk then join me and my colleague for a 3-day weekend intensive based on Brene Brown’s Rising Strong. You will leave all shiny and clean, deep down below the surface! (ok, I will stop with the analogy now!). Send me an email if you are ready to get to it! heatherdevore.lpc@gmail.com